So, how has it been a year already since I last did this annual post that I do? Absolutely mental.
Resolutions... I am all for them. Controversial I know, It isn't that I want to change myself, build a new me or anything drastic, I just want to tweak certain aspects. I guess you could say I don't set myself resolutions as such, more mind sets and fresh, positive ways of thinking.
A big part of my 2018 years goals was: Plan to plan. Make plans. Simple. Fill the diary with travel, breaks, coffee dates. And in some aspects I did and in some I really didn't. I went a bit out there and spontaneously booked a girls trip to New York for this spring which was the biggest plan of the year I am sure and a big step to do something for myself. But generally week to week I am really bad at planning. I don't see friends for months on end or try to arrange plans really last minute and then wonder why they never come to fruition.
This year I really want to make more plans with my husband, Ben. Breakfast dates, dinner dates, what ever it may be. Cinema maybe? Just time the two of us to get away even for an hour from the home and the children, just to be us for a short amount of time.
The next thing I need to focus on is personal. And I am a little ashamed to talk about it but I like to be honest. I want to stop with the shouting. The anger and frustration. I want to be able to get up and walk out of a room and go and make myself a cup of tea rather than yelling back at Alex when he flips out because he can't get his drill bit into his toy drill, or when Daisy is chopsing at me for something ridiculous! I am struggling with this at the moment and I am not sure what the turning point was but I find myself yelling and shouting and that isn't the mum I want to be. I do it and then feel sad and guilty about it, my children are my babies and to have them shouted at is my absolute nightmare yet there I am raising my voice? I know we are forced into reactions at times but I want to stamp out this behaviour in the house. It isn't too regular of a thing but still. This is probably my biggest resolution for the year.
The next is a step on from something I have been working on for a while and that is to take care of myself. You can't pour from an empty cup, or apparently so anyway! I take time out, away from social media, away from my iphone and have just 30 minutes in the bath in an evening or read a book. Time to just stop and breathe, think and not be chasing my tail or thinking about what is next. I find myself to become all consumed in ridiculous things. Social media is the absolute worst for this way of being and I find myself getting stuck down rabbit holes without knowing how I got there, in an endless whirl of profiles, statuses, tweets and squares. I love social media and think it has so many plus points but I find I need a step away and doing this helps me relax and just stop for a while. SO I guess that us 2 in 2 really, one part to just look after me, spend time pampering myself, listening to myself and the other to step away from the tie that is social media from time to time. Be more present in life.
There is still a lot of other things I want to work on and a lot of that will carry on from last years want to work on my photography and creative side, help my mum grow her business, be present, get fitter, you know the drill...
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Embracing the New Year, New Me mindset with open arms! Here's to fresh starts, endless possibilities, and the chance to create a better version of ourselves. Let's harness the energy of the new year to set inspiring goals, break barriers, and cultivate positive habits. May this year be a canvas for personal growth, resilience, and joy.
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