This has to be one of the most widely covered topics that a lifestyle / parenting blogger will cover, a day doesn't go by when one doesn't pop up on my feed. So today I am going to be a cliche and write about exactly that.
I have had this post "idea" (I know, so innovative!) in my diary for a while now but just not had the motivation to write it, slightly ironic.
But this last few months I have felt a change in myself. I have wanted to get up and go out to the gym, for me. I have been a member at the local gym for almost a year now and except for swimming lessons and things I could count on one had the amount of times I had been there for just me.
But you can't force something if you really are not interested. I wasn't at the point where I was feeling fat, had loads of weight to move or needed to get rid of my mum tum after having Alex. But that doesn't mean I was happy with myself.
If I look back I lost confidence in my self, in my body. After having Daisy I (I hate this term but can't find a suitable replacement) "snapped back" fairly quickly, and before long didn't feel much different to how I had felt pre- pregnancy. But after Alex it was different. I was looser, softer and just didn't feel like I owned my body anymore.
When I look back I have to give my body some credit, it housed and birthed TWO healthy babies. It stretched A LOT in a short amount of time and then I asked it to do the same again just a year or so later. It was bound to be different this time.
I wasn't at a point where I was hiding away under bin bags but I was feeling nervous at the prospect of a bikini for my holiday. Dressed I am happy but slightly exposed, not so much. Before our last holiday I took to going to classes, helped by a friend and it didn't take long until I started to see a little definition again. I am never going to have abs and I am never going to be super lean, I love food too much and I am just not THAT dedicated. But I am now starting to like my tummy again and feel happy in a bikini, my boobs are naff but hey they fed two babies and I always expected them to be rubbish.
And actually I am enjoying it. I feel like me again. I feel nice. And I am not sure if that is because I have the confidence from shaping myself up a little or the fact I am doing something for myself, having time out and releasing any tension of the day. Either way I will take it and ride with it, and keep at it.
Hayley x
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It's so difficult isn't it sometimes! I have a love/hate relationship with my body but overall it's just a body. So long as you are healthy that's the most important thing x
ReplyDeleteIt's really difficult, change is always tricky for me, but your right it's as long as you're happy! X
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