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Dear Daisy, It is your first day at school...

An update post with no title

I didn't really know what to call this post, I thought about it for ages but the words wouldn't come out or go together in the way that I wanted them to. It's not that I don't want to talk about these things but I just can't seem to find a few words to fit into that title box that make any sense or mean anything?

So I haven't really talked about Daisy's hand since this post here. The post where I talked openly about how Daisy was born with what the professionals call a transverse limb, to some and to us it's her little hand. I thought I'd write a little update on it, because I know people are genuinely interested, because I am proud of her development already and the more I talk about it the more accepting it feels and also importantly for awareness. 

Daisy is at a point in her development now where coordination comes into play, grabbing at things, playing, wanting to hold her bottle herself (when she isn't refusing it!!!), pushing herself up at tummy time etc. And I'm happy to say nothing is of concern at the moment. She is able to use both hands to hold her toys, she gives little cuddles with both, she has a good right hook and is able to push off it when on her tummy no problem so I honestly can't see crawling for example being a problem. 

Also the bigger she gets the more movement you notice she has in it too, she's able to freely move it like a wrist and so I'm hoping she will be able to use it more and more as she gets bigger. 

I am always ensuring I try to stimulate her to use both when playing and interacting, which I think can only help. She obviously has no clue that she has any kind of disability at this age and so shows no frustration or anything. 

I don't really notice it much anymore as I guess it's just her to us, we've accepted it. As hard as it is at times, it is what it is and we have to for her sake, but that doesn't mean I don't stop and think on the odd occasion. Times like this usually come after someone has asked about her, more often than not it's just children asking little questions. 

Children are so, so accepting. Very enquisitive but so accepting of the answer it's the way Daisy grew, she's got a special little hand and is exactly the same as you. They just seem to get back to business of playing. One little girl this week (her mummy will know who I'm talking about!) was so in love that she now says her dolly has no fingers because she's so special, just shows how accepting they are. This is why nursery and socialising with other babies and children is so beneficial for Daisy, so she grows up with these little friends that know her as no different. 

But at least children ask! Adults don't seem to ask. It's our culture I think, we don't like to talk about difficult things, we don't like conflict and we just don't face things head on. People aren't rude they just don't know what to say, over polite perhaps, I'm not sure!! Of course I could read Into things far too much because I'm over sensitive and protective. I always expect people to ask or to mention her when we are out for example at rhythm time or baby massage but nope this week we've had no one. 

I've read several blogs lately, including Born just right (find it here- www.bornjustright.com) which is a real eye opener to the little world of limb deficiencies and the way it affects peoples lives but also how it doesn't affect them as severely as you may think. We have to remember though there are different disabilities, circumstances and situations leading to them though so no two are the same. But it does help reading others experiences. Well it helps me anyway.

If you know of any other blogs etc for me to have a look at please do drop me a note with the details. 

Lots of love,
Hayley xxx


  1. Hi Hayley, I loved reading this update, I'm glad things are going well and that you are seeing just what Daisy is capable of. In a way it must be just that bit more exciting to see her develop because you get to see the wonder of what children can do even in the face of disability. Your right, children are so accepting and will be a huge help to her as she grows up, and you of course. I'm looking forward to reading more in the future, it's great that you are raising awareness for others who are going through the same thing. If I come across anything similar, blogs wise, I'll be sure to let you know.

    Saskia xx

    1. Thank you. It's lovely seeing her develop and I'm always so surprised when we go anywhere she is showing other babies up already! I'm sure they find an extra strength from somewhere to compensate! Xxx

  2. Sorry if I word any of this slightly wrong (I'm tired, plus it's hard to get the tone of things over a computer screen sometimes) but I was in school with a girl who had a transverse limb, it was either her right or her left hand, but unless you looked closely you would never have noticed, because it didn't stop her doing anything, she was great at PE! :)
    It's lovely to read the childrens comments :)
    I'm glad everything's going well for you all xxxx

  3. Go Daisy!! What a little cutie. It is amazing what children are capable of, even in the face of disability. I'm sure you'll see her go from strength to strength and amaze you more and more. Love hearing about her journey.
    It's crazy how many things can happen to our babies that you don't get told about when you're pregnant. I'd never heard of cystic hygromas till Isla was born. Guess it just makes our babies more special :) xxx

    1. Our babies are very special. I was lucky (if you can say that?) to have Daisy's hand identified at 16 weeks so it did give us a little time to prepare (again, if you can?), I know of so many people who have found out at birth. I can't even imagine.
      Is Isla having treatment? Xx

  4. I love how accepting children are of things, I always wish that it carried though into adulthood a lot more than it does. I loved reading this update, Daisy sounds like she's absolutely thriving. Can't wait to read more of her updates in the future.

    Jenna at Tinyfootsteps xx

    1. Thank you :) children are amazing, they don't over think and they don't judge! Xx

  5. So glad to hear she's doing so well, go Daisy and momma.... It's going to help her no end that you're so positive :) xxx